Inspired by a desire to make some spending money for an upcoming vacation and to have a hobby that did not involve eating and drinking (and getting fatter), a couple of months ago I decided to sign-up with Uber.
If you don’t know what Uber is, stop reading this post. Really, how did you even get here? You know how to use the internet to read random blogs but don’t know how to use the Uber app!?
Nashville is a hot market for Uber and I was pleasantly surprised when my car was selected for the UberSelect program. With dreams of witty banter with delightful passengers and cash falling from the sky, I put my Uber Partner app on and hit the mean streets of Nashville. Here are some of my favorite and not so favorite experiences:
Losing my 5 Star Rating
Like a 4.0 GPA, a 5-Star Rating can never be re-obtained once lost. Hubris led me to believe I would be 5-Star forever, but all it took was one rainy night and one lady’s inability to see my car in the dark for her to rate me 4-stars! I was there, clear as day, but she went the wrong way and couldn’t see me and got frustrated as if I can magically teleport to the lobby of her apartment building. Ever since that encounter with evil I became more and more distrusting of my passengers. Did they think I was talking too much? Not enough? Were they judging the route Waze was taking? Were they jealous of my good looks and ready to take it out on me by withholding that 5th star!? On an airport run I toted two rather obnoxious characters. Certain that they didn’t like me I preemptively gave them a 4-star! Justice was served…until I realized they gave me 5 stars! The rest of the evening I spent feeling slightly guilty, but not that guilty, because they were obnoxious and didn’t know who had won the mayoral election from the previous day. I should have given them 1 star.
Drunk (and entitled) College Kids
My experiences at a certain overpriced university in the city have made me nervous for our future. Granted, I enjoy giving tipsy sorority girls rides in my UberSelect for a premium rate for just a couple blocks of travel time, but they could just walk or bike like normal people. That said, I Uber and Lyft to work on a near daily basis (when I could easily walk or bike), so I’m basically just a hypocrite and will stop talking now.
Fun Drunk People
These are my favorite people in the whole world! Not only are they chill and just enjoying the ride, but they are also quite entertaining. Especially when they are pretending NOT to be drunk in the misguided notion that I would somehow judge them (girl, we’ve all taken an Uber after a few too many drinks, I think that’s the foundation of their business model).
Easily Impressed Older People
Some people think Uber is the most magical thing of all time and I enjoy their company tremendously. They gush about how wonderful it is and how it makes their vacations so much more pleasant and how they learn a lot about the places they are visiting from helpful Uber drivers. Their genuine enthusiasm about ride-sharing helps chip away the cynicism in my soul.
Cougars Who Think You Are Attractive and Invite You to Concerts
This only happened once, but it was the most memorable experience I’ve had in my ride-sharing career. After picking up a couple of gal-pals to go to a concert they mentioned they had two extra tickets to the show and asked if I wanted to come. Not one to shy away from strangers offering me free/discounted shows at the Ryman I said yes, dropped them off, and got my own ride downtown. After a few drinks and a fun time one of ladies made sure to let me know how cute I was and what an enjoyable time she had. Be still my heart!
—
For now I’ve retired from my Uber and Lyft driving days, but perhaps the siren song of the open road will lure me back over the holidays and I’ll have a chance to make some more memories. Until then, sign-up using my referral code so I can make free $$$ off your labor. Thanks!